A proper goodbye
by LoonyLittleThing
Summary: The Doctor stumbled into the Tardis after leaving Donna Noble Journeys End and receives a Holomessage from her, saying goodbye. Oneshot


**I don't own Doctor Who.**

**Enjoy!**

The Doctor closed the Tardis door behind him and strolled over to the controls, settling down in the chair next to them. The Tardis hummed peacefully as usually, yet, it felt so quiet. So empty... She'd been out of his life for about 4 minutes now and he already missed her like mad. He inhaled and tried to swallow down the mixture of emotions that expanded within him, wiping his teary eyes, stopping himself from crying. The angst was eating him up from inside. Donna. Oh Donna. She'd been so happy. Properly happy. She'd finally realised how amazing she was. Blimy, she was. All that knowledge, the way she used it, so much imagination. And on top of that she still remained the way she was, keeping a personal twist on whatever she came up with. Daleks, spinning around like confused children on ice. He couldn't resist smiling. She'd always made him smile. Always looked after him. It was nice to be taken care of. As an equal. He'd been there for her a couple of times aswell. Maybe that's what true friendship was. Mutually caring, and always having a good laugh. Donna. Of all the horrible things that could have happened to her, this was by far the worst. Never less, she was gone now...

"_Is this thing on_?" a voice spoke, a very familiar voice, the Doctor spun around, "Donna?" He screamed, he could barely believe that this was happening, but he knew that voice, her voice, like if he could ever forget the sound of it, but... That was impossible! And yet, there she was. And yet, there she wasn't.

It was a hologram. A message from her. From Donna. HoloDonna was standing in front of him, smiling as if she though talking to thin air, which probably was the thing she'd dune, recording this, felt a bit silly.

The image was a bit fuzzy, but soon, to the Doctors surprise, she'd got the hang of it.

Donna smiled towards him and she couldn't resist smiling back. "_Hello Spaceman_." he ran over towards the image of her, grinning from ear to ear. "_Or should I say goodbye_?" the Doctors grin faded slightly. _"At least that's the plan, this message is suppose to arrive when I'm gone. If I'm still here, which is a possibility since I haven't got a clue of how this thing works, then turn this message off and watch it later._" she frowned her forehead at him. "_Don't you dare peak at this_!" He noticed that she blushed and made a move towards her as if he was going to put a hand on her shoulder as an act of comfort, before he realised that she wasn't real. He froze. Her eyes had turned sad as the image of her eyed him anxiously. It nearly killed him. "_Anyway_" she continued, sounding more serious now _"I've had this weird feeling for a while now, and I've come across some people that have mentioned it, it's like if there is something that's gonna happen to me, in the future, or well, if you ever see this message, it's probably already happened_." She laughed a bit unsurely stroking some hair out of her face. "_But maybe that... thing that so many people keeps mentioning, maybe that thing will happen twenty years in the future! Blimy, you must think I look so young! If that's the case I mean..._" she sighed, giving him a painful look and spoke softly. "_What I'm trying to say Doctor, is that," her voice changed back into it's familiar lound and witty genre "as long as you didn't just dropped me of on Mars or somewhere else just as useless_" he couldn't help but smiling, though for a second he wonder if the place he'd actually left her, her home, took part in that category. She'd begged him not to send her back after all. He shocked his head. But it was her home. Part from here. HoloDonnas irritated expression faded and a kinder expression took it's place _"I just wanted to say thanks really. For letting me come with you. Me of all people._"she laughed dreamily "_That ment alot more to me then you could ever imagine. My life was so dull, so pointless and all the sudden I had the entire universe at my feet. Traveling with you truly is the one thing I want to do for the rest of my life._" her eyes started to tear up. The Doctor felt like as if he was dying inside, something he'd felt several times during these past few days. He didn't fancy it. _"but apparently I'm not_" Donna continued, her voice shaking slightly."_And I'm sure there's a reason, a pretty damn good one. Neverless, it seems like if I didn't got to say goodbye_." she grinned at him, still with tears in her eyes. "Except I did! And I just." her voice regained it's calmness, as it always did when he needed her the most. "_I just don't want you take the blame for it,..., unless you pushed me into a sun or something._"she laughed unhappily, but continued with a steady voice "_I'm not like the little schoolgirls you usually bring. I can take care of myself. My decisions are my own and I guess I have to pay for the consequences of my actions aswell_." she frowned her forehead "_you always go on about how you eventually mess up the people you love, maybe it's a bit ironic that I'll telling you that right now, but I just wanted to say that you didn't screw me up, because I was so much happier being with you, then I've even been before!_" she smiled happily as she thought about it "_all the things we've seen and dune together, it's been the best time of my life really. And it's not like I could just stroll off and being a new, successful life after all this. This isn't some vacation, this is the greatst part of my life, not the one where I get all messed up, and even if I do get messed up, it would still be worth it. Anything would be worth this. So don't you dare blame any of the parts of, well this, on yourself. You didn't make me lose something you made me win and if my or someone else's actions screwed that up, then so be it. This one is on me_." she gave him a stubborn lock but added quickly "_well, if you can fix it, then don't just stand there, but if you can't._.." her eyes started to get watery again. "_If you can't, then you need to move on. You still need someone, never forget that! Like I said before, I can take care of myself, so obviously it was either me or someone else that caused my absence today, not you, don't you dare think that!_" tears started slipping down her cheeks. She paused for a couple of seconds. Felt like an eternity. The Doctor keep watching her, wishing she'd never fade away. "_I'm gonna miss you Spaceman. And just... Please, don't forget about me. Remember all the fun we had. I know I will!_" the words hit the Doctor straight in the face and he felt like if his hearts was going to suffocate him. She wouldn't remember. Of all the horrible things she could possibly imagine, forgetting wasn't one of them. "_Do something marvelous. Have fun. Don't give up._" her eyes overflowed with tears. "_I'm sorry..._" she apologise anxiously while trying to clear her eyes and gave him a final look. "_But I am so thankful. I guess this is goodbye then_." she smiled one final Donna Noble smile. "_you silly,..., skinny,..., martian,..., Spaceman,..., timeboy,...thing!_" The image of her faded of. The Doctor felt it hard to breath. He felt so sad and so happy at the same time. Of all the things he could wish for, he'd actually got a goodbye. He buried his head in his hands, head pounding. Not sure of how to deal with all of these emotions, he thought of Donna Noble. She'd know what to do. She could shout and tease him all she wanted, but when it counted she'd always known how to comfort him, always saying the right things, even if he'd been lightyears from admitting that he'd actually needed comforting or hearing those kind of things. She'd always been honest with him, in a way that no one had ever been before. He needed her more then ever now. He closed his eyes and wished that he'd manage to give her proper goodbye. That he'd never have had to give her a proper goodbye. He felt a tear running down his cheek for the first time in a very long while. What was he supposed to now?


End file.
